[dreamwidth mirror]
~550 words
bekumiza
cw for body horror and gore

“Do you remember it?” he breathes into Mizael’s ear during one of their little trips to the human world. Feels Mizael’s shiver and barks out a sharp little laugh. 

“Do you remember waking up?” he goes on, before Mizael can ask what he means.

Mizael shakes his head, Mizael opens his mouth to breathe no into the darkness, but there’s a flashing to his eyes and a sudden sheen of sweat that breaks out across his skin that cries yes, yes even if Mizael will never say it aloud. Yes, then, Mizael remembers waking up.

“Durbe remembers waking up,” Mizael says, when Vector doesn’t say any more. “He woke up in a crystal, he says.” His voice is shaking.

Vector laughs, the kind of laugh that flashes like knife edges, and digs his nails into Mizael’s chest.

(pain is grounding)

(they’ve learned that well)

“Alit won’t speak, since his duel,” Mizael says when Vector lets up, his voice steadier now but still hushed, still hesitant. “But Gilag says the same as Durbe. That they were whole when they woke.”

Vector only snorts, this time. “Wonder about Nasch and Merag. Maybe it was just us. Maybe we’re just special.”

He can practically read Mizael like an open book. The frown, the twist of his mouth, the averted eyes that say I’d understand if it were only you, but. Vector laughs again.

“What was first, for you?” he asks suddenly, watches Mizael’s eyes flick rapidly back to his face. “It was the wings, for me. Lucky for you, huh? They grew inside and then when they got too big they ripped out of me.” He laughs. It’s more biting now, more hysterical.

Mizael’s fingers dig into his throat painfully, silence it.

(thanks, Miza, he thinks to himself)

“Claws after that,” he carries on, “Which was good. Easier to get the skin off when it started to tear.”

There’s a kind of strange calm washing over him now, that dulls away his laughter to silence and sets him staring off into the darkness.

(this is new)

He feels Mizael’s hands on him, Mizael’s teeth leaving marks in his neck and it’s like some half-felt dream. Are you even listening? he wonders.

(of course Mizael is listening)

(the air is still and silent around them but at the same time it’s humming, electrified, and he can’t work out which is the reality)

(maybe neither; maybe both)

“Mouth hurt,” he says. “At first I’d keep opening my mouth still. Keep ripping open where it was trying to fuse.”

“I did the same,” Mizael breathes into Vector’s neck. Vector nearly jumps. Hadn’t expected Mizael to speak. “I used my claws,” he adds.

Vector shivers sharply and Mizael’s nails drag suddenly down his sides. They’re sharp.

(his claws are sharper)

(Vector can imagine the blood)

That strange calm is still enveloping him but Vector laughs again anyway. It’s strange, hollow.

(Mizael laughs too, into his neck, or maybe it’s a sob; something sharp and choked, anyway)

“Maybe the others were lying about what they remember,” Vector says. He doesn’t believe it. Neither does Mizael.

“No,” says Mizael, “It’s just us.”

Vector laughs. “Just us. Special.”

Mizael doesn’t answer him. He sinks his teeth into an unmarked spot on Vector’s neck, though, and Vector supposes it’s probably supposed to mean something.

(yes, we’re special or no, we’re not the same like that again and Vector doesn’t know which)

(doesn’t much care, to be honest)

(he laughs)